my heart_empty

two years ago, my heart hurt, not like this though.

One moment your crying over your ex-boyfriend another being betrayed by friends.

Then life really throws you something – a moment stuck in your head and your heart forever. You got to go on though, you have to push on.

This is where faith comes in.

Something bigger, the light at the end, the feeling you get when your favorite song comes on.

All you can ever do is dance, sit in the sun, feel those feelings.

Fill your heart up with all those things.

OK that was lame.

It’s been really hard to write here. It’s always hard. I feel like whatever I say will be too abstract or go over someone’s head and backfire to make me look dumb. People have really hurt me. I know it’s somewhat my fault. I read tons of self help books and motivation/inspirational quotes hoping one day it will stick.

I lack boundaries.

You see this online. You see entries about Energy Vampires and Narcissists and the chaos they can cause on an Empath. I think this is an easier way to talk about it and creates a positive label instead of a negative one such as wet blanket or push over. It is important to be honest, it is important to own up to your issue. This is something I completely believe in. I think though it is better to call yourself an Empath without boundaries than a negative term.

I read online somewhere that someone who is a people pleaser is manipulative; I am fairly open minded with viewpoints, however, I felt as though this one was wrong.

I will continue with my thoughts on these themes in the near future. I would like to discuss the word Manipulative Vs. the word Charming. What it really means and why someone is a “People Pleaser” to me. How it feels to be a loner in a group mentality society. And so forth. Maybe throw some poems and pictures and fashion thoughts. This is my website after-all.

Sorry for this jumble – this post and website is for me.

2007-2011

the years I lived and died.

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This is the start of my site > go to the home page for more details.

Welcome to my Story.